Consider the image below this line. What do you notice right away?
If your answer is “the black dot,” like many other people, it just shows how our mind has been programmed to see the hardly 1% portion which is black, ignoring the 99% which is sparkling white. It highlights the average person’s tendency to focus on “imperfections” and “issues” represented by the black dot, while the white paper represents everything else which is perfect and going well.
Why do we see only the black dot?
There are many reasons why we are conditioned to see the black dot.
Real life examples
You want to quit your job and pursue your dreams. You choose to listen and be daunted by naysayers who warn you about the risks involved.Remember they aren’t even living the life that you want.
You are so beautiful with sharp features, but instead of celebrating that, you focus on the areas of “imperfection” like a bit of extra weight, oily skin or a mole on your body.
You have a job with a good package, nice colleagues, and continuous learning opportunities, but you focus on how strict your boss is, being a hard task master.
You get compliments day in and out which you don’t pay much attention to, yet when you receive an insensitive comment by someone who doesn’t even matter in your life, you take it to heart and start feeling depressed.
You have a painful cavity in one tooth.You shift your attention from the 31 healthy teeth to this one.
You break up with your best friend, just because she didn’t wish you on your birthday, ignoring the innumerable favors she did to you.
What happens when we see only the black dot?
By focusing on what is lacking in our lives, we create more experiences of scarcity. The law of attraction works to bring more situations of imperfections in our lives which add to our tensions. People who are conditioned to see the black dot become pessimistic. They invite failures in their life. When they start pointing the shortcomings in other people’s lives and criticizing them they lose friends and become aloof.
Don’t ignore the black dot
Some of you may feel that ignoring the black dot is not the answer and that you need to focus on the black dot and do something about it. Well, if you choose this strategy, here are three possibilities; keep worrying about it, keep complaining about it or take some concrete steps to reduce or eliminate the black dot. The only sensible thing to do is the later, but a majority people prefer the former, which keeps them miserable.
Once you start exploring ways to remove the black dot, without any feeling of inferiority complex, or tension the solution will not be far away. It would be prudent to consult others who had similar issues and how they got over them.
How to Stop Focusing on the Black Dot?
The only way to stop focusing on the black dot is to shift your attention to the white portion which dominates the scene. In life, we tend to overlook and take for granted many wonderful things that happen around us and focus our attention on small, dot-like failures and disappointments. See the black dot (the problem) as it is. Don’t overly magnify its presence, but don’t ignore it either.
I am quite convinced that, if we paid more attention to the majority of things that are going well in our lives, we will have a better attitude and we’d get better results. When we look back into our lives, we mostly ponder over the things that we wish were different. But such thoughts only create unhappiness, so are worthless.
Count your blessings
What about the basic necessities of life? Do you feel gratitude every day for the food you eat, the clothes you wear, and the house you stay in, the love of your near and dear ones, or do you take all of these things for granted? Worse yet, do you complain that you don’t have more?
And let’s not forget your body and your health. Your heart and brain are working tirelessly 24x7x365 to ensure smooth functioning of your whole body. Your lungs, kidneys, eyes, ears, teeth, hands, feet are healthy and enabling you to enjoy each moment. Stop taking this incredible body for granted. Develop an attitude of gratitude. Be happy and live a life filled with love.
Great leaders find counsel in the words of Henry David Thoreau: “It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see.” Our life is a gift given to us with love and care, and we always have reasons to celebrate – our friends, the job that provides our livelihood, happy and caring family… Take your eyes away from the black dots in your life. Enjoy all the blessings, each moment, life gives you. Be happy and live a life filled with love!
Tags: attention, black dot, criticism, imperfection, shortcoming
I am Jaspinder Brar but people call me #Jas#Brar# and I live near Heathrow airport in London. Since 2014,I have written practical articles and newsletters about life, social skills, self-confidence, Mindfulness, live your dream and becoming happier. I am also the author of 2 courses and guides, on life coaching. I have guided many people to the right path in life. I'm a life coach. ..I change lives....I motivate people. .....I am a teacher public speaker and a Dad !!
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